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Takes place in the evening on March 26th, 2026
Sailor Clara kept clutching at his miniskirt awkwardly to keep it from flying up as he patrolled around the city one evening. He had slowly started to get more and more used to his high heels, but he wasn't sure he would ever get used to the skirt. Seeing other senshi, he wondered if perhaps his outfit would cover more if he ever managed to become a super or eternal senshi.
With his luck, though, not to mention his sphere, there was just as likely a chance it would cover even less. Clara shuddered at the thought. Surely that couldn't have been possible. If it was and it happened to occur, he wasn't sure he would have been able to handle the business of powering up and patrolling anymore.
He wished he knew what he was doing; that there was someone or something that could give him an idea of whether he was making a difference or not in the world by doing what he did. It seemed a thankless task. Sighing, he wished he had someone to talk to about his senshi woes. It wasn't like he could converse on the topic with just anyone, after all, but there were still so few like himself he had met thus far.
Susanoo was walking his usual route today. He was handling three routes actually. Gagarin was overseas a few days for work - some fashion.... Thing,,,, 0 and Oumuamuya was.... Working too. Susanoo wondered why he agreed to a long patrol, but here he was regardless. They absolutely owed him though. He was about to turn the corner when he sensed another aura and paused, head tilting. Ah, someone his level, and he looked about. Perhaps he'd have company after all.
"Hello?" Susanoo called politely, smiling warmly.
Clara startled at the voice, not realizing he hadn't been alone, and quickly turned to see a handsome young man there. He blushed, embarrassed and surprised, and pulled his skirt down harder than ever.
"H-hello," he answered, large green eyes regarding the other senshi curiously. He had never seen a senshi outfit like that before. And his energy signature was so like his own. "Um...I'm Sailor Clara, senshi of Embarrassment," he revealed, feeling more embarrassed simply doing so. "Sorry. I'd bow, but...I don't trust myself to do so decently in a skirt this short."
"Ah! I'm Sailor Susanoo, Senshi of Tengu." Susanoo said, but his smile offered a handshake brightly. "Don't worry about it! I understand. I've attempted to wear mini skirts, personally, but, ah... Well." He sighed. "Short skirts really are tricky." Susanoo wasn't ashamed of being genderfluid... Or enjoying drag regardless of his gender.
"So, Clara, did you just start a route for the night, or..." Susanoo asked. He was hoping for a start, if only so he had company. He recalled a time he only wanted to patrol if Dubhe did. And then school picked up after she outclassed him.... He supposed she didn't need him protecting her anymore.
"Tengu?" Clara repeated, raising his brows as he absently accepted Susanoo's handshake. "Wow. And your name...the storm and sea god? That's impressive."
He blinked rapidly in astonishment. "Wait, you've...attempted to wear mini skirts?" he asked, even more blown away by the revelation. And as if that wasn't amazing enough to him, Susanoo didn't seem the least bit embarrassed or ashamed to say so. Well, at least about having tried them on. But it made Clara feel a little less ridiculous to know he wasn't the only one who found the skirts to be...'tricky'.
"Yes...yes I did," he confessed, tucking a stray lock of hair behind his ear as he forced himself to tear his gaze away. He had to stop staring. "Uh...did you?" Suddenly he felt his face burning up again. "Sorry, you must have been perfectly fine minding your own business when suddenly you come across...all *this*." He gestured awkwardly to himself.
"Yeah. I'm...": Susanoo felt embarrassed slightly, grinning. "I'm... Genderfluid. Sometimes I identify as a woman. But I also well... I enjoy drag sometimes too in either gender."
And while it made him happy he knew some people might look down on him for it. He still tried, thopugh. Not everyone judged after all. Then he lit up.
"I did. I was covering for a couple friends but -- would you like company? More eyes catch more incursions and all." Susanoo offered, smiling. Sure, asking might be a little awkward, but it was polite, and safer for both of them.
Forgetting himself again, Clara stared. "You can...do that?" he asked, having never before heard the term 'genderfluid'. He also admired the way Susanoo grinned despite the slight hints he may have been embarrassed. That was a heck of a way to deal with one's embarrassment. He thought it was very brave of him.
"I, um..." he lowered his gaze again, suddenly feeling compelled to mention something he had not thought he would have been able to tell anyone very easily, much less someone he had only just met. "...I...like to wear clothing for women too, sometimes. I feel more comfortable in it. But I don't really know why or what that means. Just that I do." He blushed harder, staring at the ground. "E-even when I'm not powered up. I...I never knew there were any other guys who did that."
Clara glanced up again immediately when he was asked if he would have liked some company. "Really?!" He studied the other senshi's face. "You wouldn't be...you know. Embarrassed...to patrol with me? I'm not really dressed the most decently, after all..." And he felt all the more awkward standing alongside someone who looked amazing in their own senshi outfit. "...You don't have to keep me company, you know. If you're waiting for some friends, I'd hate to make things awkward with my presence." He knew he wasn't the most socially adept.
Susanoo smiled, calming and pat his shoulder - a warm, compassionate gesture.
"Well... For some they enjoy the liberation of feeling like someone else. Or it makes them feel attractive. For some it's who they are. Some prefer it because it's affirming to their body image. For me it's partly because some days I'm a woman and I want to present such. And sometimes, I'm in drag and want to be at a club for karaoke or a drag show just... To feel like myself. It's not always a sign, but it _can_ be and that's okay. I totally get it. Just remember you deserve to be comfortable in your own skin. To feel like yourself." Susanoo smiled softly.
"Really. Actually I like company patrolling. We never know what we'll run into and it's safer as a pair. Especially with our power levels. Plus, it's never a bad idea to char either." Susanoo smiled. "Plus it'll make things go faster. Relax. I wouldn't ask if I didn't want to come."
"Wow," Clara said again, and immediately felt stupid he had nothing more intelligent to say. "I, um...bet you look really pretty as a woman." He blinked. "Wait, you do karaoke, too?!"
At being told he deserved to be comfortable in his own skin, Clara inexplicably felt tears come to his eyes. "I...I never thought of it that way before," he murmured. "Thank you. That...means a lot."
Ahhh, this was bad. The more they talked. The more Clara found himself liking the guy. As in really liking him. As in he thought he was starting to get butterflies. But after the last person he had felt that around had disappeared from his life so suddenly, he was afraid and nervous and angry with himself. He had to stop thinking that way and quell the butterflies!
They could be normal, right? Perfectly normal; just a couple of White Moon Senshi on the same side going on patrol. Together. Talking about deeply personal things. Uh oh.
"You're right," Clara agreed, chuckling anxiously. "You probably want to get this done and over with as soon as possible. I'm sure you have a lot to do as a civilian."
"Sometimes it helps to hear." Susanoo admitted. "I used to dress as a girl some days because I wanted to be pretty. My.. Dad sat down with me finally to talk it out. Kind of surprised me, he's not like me in gender, but he said I was okay and I was allowed to feel like me. He suggested maybe I wasn't a man... We talked. Turned out I'm.. Genderfluid and the times I was upset wearing men's clothing I was feeling female, and he and my cousin's father sat everyone down to explain I was allowed to be pretty in my own opinion and actually, most of my family backed it. Maybe not all, but most." Susanoo paused.
"Maybe you need a good support network. I'd be happy to introduce you to some of my friends. If you like fashion or high fashion, I know a guy." Susanoo offered. "And he's the last to judge someone about what they wear. Hell, he's kind of a honey badger about people expressing themselves." Susanoo wasn't saying Gagarin was a honey badger in personality at large. But he knew he acted like it.
At mention of his civilian life, Susanoo paused, turning red.
"I mean... School is important. So is work! But I ah.... My degree... Is.... Psychology. I'm in my doctorate's to... Be a therapist. Help people. Both... Help civilians but also... Everyone in the war. There's no real... Support for anyone on any side. No therapist to help people work through it all who understands. So I want to also use it to help everyone process." He looked... Almost embarrassed to admit it. Knowing he wanted to help chaos members too. But they were human and maybe his degree was teaching hum to remember that. "Aside live experience or classes I'm just a part time barista unpowered. I read a lot. Trying to learn Japanese from a friend I'm crashing with. She's kind of like family."
Honestly, he figured Oumuamua might like meeting Clara. She would understand... Probably? Really he worried about people, and he found the contrast ironic after his early senshi days.
Clara looked flabbergasted at Susanoo's story. His family was nothing like that. They would never have been so understanding or accepting of who he was. His sisters would have, of course, but not his parents. Especially not his mother. He was the male heir to the family business first and himself second. He wasn't allowed to indulge in what he wanted. "You are...so lucky," the senshi sighed wistfully. "I'm so envious. I never dreamed parents could ever be like that about their kids. My mother doesn't even like the fact that I wear my hair long." What he wouldn't have given to be who he wanted to be. To do what he wanted to do and wear what he wanted to wear. Alas, though; it was probably a pipe dream and never meant to be.
When the other senshi spoke of a good support network, however, Clara listened curiously. He wasn't sure what that meant, exactly, but it sounded...nice. And he thought it was extremely nice of Susanoo to offer to introduce him to that network; to some of his friends. "Thank you," he said gratefully. "I'd like that very much."
Noticing Susanoo turn red all of a sudden, Clara blinked before laughing good-naturedly, charmed by the taller young man's expression of emotion. It was nice to know he wasn't the only one who got embarrassed at times like those. "That sounds really amazing. What you're studying and what you want to be and why," the silver-haired senshi commented warmly as he walked. "And I think you're right. The best we have for helping people through things are those cats, but many hardly tell you anything when they awaken you and then they're gone. Not to mention they're not the ones who have to power up and fight chaos people! Especially not while wearing ridiculous outfits!"
Clara realized he was getting a little worked up and took a few deep breaths to try to calm himself down. "Sorry," he apologized. "It's just annoying I've already been at this senshi thing for a while and there's still so little I know about it. I don't even know how to contact others on our side. Or even know others to contact." He looked hopefully at Susanoo. "Would you know how, by any chance...?"
"Being a barista isn't bad. You've got to find some way to pay for college to be a therapist, right?" He smiled. "なぜ日本語を学びたいのですか? (Naze nihongo o manabitai no desu ka?)" Clara asked. "Why do you want to learn Japanese? Is there something particular about that language that made you want to learn it, or does it just happen to be the one that the friend you're crashing with knows?"
"...I know I am. I'll tell you more sometime. If it helps any, my grandfather's the patriarch and he's... So controlling...." Susanoo sighed. Better than his Uncle Valents. He heard what happened top Ace. Thank the stars Ace was with his cousin. The kid needed the safety. "Family is seldom perfect though. One of my uncles is facing time for neglecting my little cousin for example. Luckily... My other cousin has him now." He smiled.
"And of course I'm happy to introduce you! Gagarin's still learning, only been a senshi almost a year, and Oumuamua's... Almost like chosen family? Honestly I was covering my route and theirs tonight since Gagarin's in Europe for a fashion conference or some... Business... thing involving haute couture or another and Oumuamua's part time work called." A pause. "You know I might recommend talking to Gagarin about the clothing preferences. He.... I heard he endured a lot to transition to a man before his folks had a car crash." Susanoo admitted.
"And I know, yes! Senshi phones., I back my senshi phone up with a real world contact in some cases. Oumuamua I'm living with. My brother made living at home... Less than feasible." Susanoo smiled. "I'm more than happy to help show you how to use the phone, if you need it." He offered, pulling his senshi phone from.... Well his little manga-loving brain called it 'Hammerspace', the Senshi pocket dimension.
"Oh. I'm sorry to hear that," the silver-haired senshi answered. Maybe Susanoo knew more about what it was like to live under a controlling adult than he had originally thought. He wondered how had navigated through that. "Neglecting your little cousin? That's horrible," Clara said. "I'm...glad it sounds like things ended up going well for him in the end, though."
He tried to commit the new names brought up to memory even if they were quite strange to him. Gagarin and Oumuamua. At least Susanoo was easy to remember. But then Susanoo said something that confused Clara. "Transition...to a man...?" he repeated, looking perplexed. "I'm sorry, what does that mean...?" Perhaps he was referring to Gagarin having experienced some traditional culture ceremony or something where someone changed from a child into a man...? "Sorry, what...did a car crash have to do with anything?"
Clara blinked again. He wasn't sure what Susanoo meant when he said he 'backed up his senshi phone with a real world contact'. But maybe he would show him how. "What did you brother do?" he asked, instantly curious. But then he blushed and looked down, tugging on his bangs over his right eye in a nervous gesture. "I'm sorry...I don't meant to be nosy. You don't have to answer that."
Brightening when the senshi of Tengu offered to show him how to use the phone, he raised his head again, eyes twinkling with delight. "Yes, please. I would...love to be able to get in touch with you again if I can. You and your friends, if possible. They sound wonderful."
"So am I. he's a good kid. Sweet. Loves birds." Susanoo chuckled, smiling softly. Then he nodded. "Transitioned. Some people are born one gender but identify and see themselves as another gender, and having a body reflecting the wrong gender makes them feel uncomfortable in their skin. I don't have dysphoria on days I feel like a woman, but Gagarin.... He was born a female,. but a female body made him angry and stressed and upset. He's a man, entirely." Susanoo nodded. Then, he pulled out his senshi phone.
"See, when we use add contact, you scan a senshi or knight with the camera to add them to the phone." Susanoo showed Clara the app carefully, patient. Always patient.
Clara listened attentively, intensely fascinated. Was he the same way, he wondered? Was that why he felt so much more comfortable wearing dresses and long hair like his sisters were made to wear? Was that, perhaps, why his younger sister, Nijiko, disliked wearing those things as much as he enjoyed them? He wasn't sure. Still, it sounded like a concept worth exploring.
"Dysphoria..." He repeated the unfamiliar word curiously, making a mental note to look it up later. "Born a female? Oh! Huh...that's interesting." Perhaps if he talked to that Gagarin guy, he could explain more to Clara about what it was like and he could figure it out for himself. Just like Susanoo had somewhat explained about being genderfluid. Maybe Clara and Nijiko were genderfluid instead.
Then he turned his attention to the matter of the senshi phones, taking out his own to follow along with what Susanoo was doing. When his phone scanned Susanoo, he gasped. "Uh oh! I'm sorry, did you not want me to do that? I forgot to ask! Should I delete it?" He paused in his panic before panicking more. "Can I delete it?!"
"I definitely recommend talking to a therapist, to work through it, figure it out. But there's nothing wrong with you regardless. They can help you process and work through this." Susanoo smiled, before focusing on the matter at hand.
"No that's perfect! Now you can open your contacts and text or call them from your contact list, like a normal phone. I try to power down, and add others to my civilian phone too, if they want." Susanoo nodded. "See, I like the redundancy in an emergency, or to keep touch when touch powered down. Like..." Susanoo paused.
"Well I left home after a bad fight. My brother... Does not.... He's a jackass. I actually called Oumuamua and now I live at her place with her family. It helps to build a social network you can talk to among Order." Susanoo motioned. "Doesn't seem to work with Chaos, sadly."
Clara blushed again when Susanoo told him there was nothing wrong with him. That was new. Usually his mother had always told him the opposite. It was comforting to be given an explanation and told differently for a change. "Thank you," he said, smiling. "I'll see what I can do about that."
"Oh, you do?!" Clara looked surprised. He supposed it would have been okay if they were both of the same faction, which they were. "That makes sense. Well...I would really like to hear you sing karaoke sometime," he admitted bashfully. "If you'd feel up to it, of course."
Clara nodded at Susanoo's mention of building a social network among order. "I never thought of doing that as a powered person. Perhaps because I didn't really know very many powered people in my faction. At least until now." He beamed. "I'm glad I met you, Sailor Susanoo."
"I'm happy to help." Susanoo grinned. He moved through his phone, pulling up a picture of a grouchy-looking senshi in green and white with brown hair and light blue eyes, and showed it to Clara.
"This is Gagarin, if you see him out there. I figure, if you did - and just let him know I suggested you talk to him -- he'll probably be a good friend for someone to talk to about it. He's././... He's been a senshi almost a year." A deep sigh. Gagarin was fun, just.... Very.....
Challenging.
"And I'd love that. I can show you my work too, if... I mean, if you're into thinks like games... Cartoons and Anime.... Cosplay...." Susanoo blushed. "It's themed. Themed coffee shop."
Clara was surprised that one was able to show images of other senshi on one's senshi phone, but he supposed that was at least partly what the scanning was for. He committed the image of Gagarin to memory along with the name and tried to remember to let him know what Susanoo said. "Oh...okay. I'll be sure to do that. Thank you!"
He beamed when Susanoo mentioned showing him his work and all the things that his coffee shop was themed after. "That sounds like a wonderful place to work," he remarked, trying to picture it. "I'll have to stop by sometime if you can give me the name and address. I would...be happy to meet up with you there."
"Any time. I'm always happy to help." Susanoo smiled.
"And work is... Helpful too. They think powered people are cosplayers." He sighed. "I will not deny going in for hot drinks when I'm powered just so I can have one when powered. Ah-heh." He was red, actually embarrassed.
The senshi of embarrassment's brows shot up at the mention that they thought powered people were cosplayers. Then he laughed. "That's a brilliant idea," he said. "That way, they can't tell you work there as a civilian."
"How about you show me there after we patrol today and I can buy us both something?" Clara suggested before his face flushed as well. "Uh, not um...not if you think it inappropriate of me or anything, though, of course."
"They can't. So I try to carry cash when powered." Susanoo grinned. "And I'd love to take you. If we power down, we get free coffee too. Employee perk. If not they're still a good place. Coffee, tea, that stuff."
"Oh, no. I insist on paying. My treat," Clara said brightly, assuming that, by now, if Susanoo had a partner of some sort, he would have mentioned them perhaps not liking some stranger buying him a drink. "My family may be many things, but they're also rather wealthy, so I don't mind spending their money every now and then." It was one of the few perks of being the family heir.
"By the way...you never mentioned why you're choosing to learn Japanese of all languages. Is it just because it happens to be the one your friend knows, or some other reason?"
"Ah, if you insist." Susanoo chuckled, but it was the kind of gentle amusement. How did... He keep making rich friends? Well he wasn't complaining.
"Ah, actually I want to read more books and I enjoyed Japanese media. Actually - Oumuamua's family spends part of their time in Kyoto. They're from Japan. She's taking us to Kyoto for Hanami." Susanoo admitted, rubbing the back of his neck. "And I'd like to speak properly instead of sound like another, well... Fan boy."
Siv was adopted by law, but to the family, she was still family. Unlike Ezekiel, she grew up fluent. In the culture. "I think id I didn't try, Oumuamua might actually give me more than a tongue lashing." He laughed.
"I do," Clara answered with a laugh. "And really? Well, you can always practice on me if you like, then."
He chuckled when Susanoo mentioned not wanting to sound like another fan boy. "An ignorant otaku?" he asked with a laugh. "It's nice that you're trying to make the effort regardless of whether your friend would have given you a tongue-lashing or not."
Maybe it had been too much to ask him that question in Japanese before, though, since he hadn't answered it. Perhaps he didn't know enough Japanese to have recognized what he had said yet. Oh well. Hopefully Susanoo hadn't taken offense.
"Oh, I'd enjoy that. I've been practicing at home a good deal. My friend's family is from Kyoto, technically speaking. Oumuamua's adopted in but - she grew up speaking it and they're like a second family." Susanoo grinned fondly. No questions -- just... Accepted. But he and Siv we like siblings in many ways in interaction. Amenable ones. It was... It was nice.
"I see! That's very interesting," Clara remarked. "Having a nice Japanese chat or two would be enjoyable for me as well, since I sometimes get a little homesick here. Still...there's a lot more freedom to be myself here than back home, so I'm not complaining."
He walked a little faster in his heels, smiling. "Let's pick up the pace, shall we? I want to see what treats your coffee shop has to offer. The sooner we make our rounds, the faster we can reward ourselves for making them."
Susanoo chuckled, grinning warmly. "See, now I should introduce you to her too. I just warn, Oumuamua's adopted in, but she was adopted young. She's just working her civilian job tonight. Both arm."
Susanoo grinned through, walking. "I mean, there's coffee, t4ea, matcha, non-alcoholic cider, cocoa, espressos.... Any snacks we kind of have delivered from a bakery nearby I think, so..." Susanoo was happy to pick up the pace, though.
"Aww, I thought you already were going to," Clara laughed. "I'd be happy to meet any and all your friends. They all sound like very interesting people."
"Ah ah ah ah ah!" he said, putting his hands over his ears. "No spoilers!! I want to see when we *get* there! You're ruining all the fun!" Clara complained, though not seriously. He was still smiling, eyes twinkling as he beamed at Susanoo.
For someone who had been dreading his patrols, suddenly Clara was enjoying it immensely. In fact, despite his urging to pick up the pace, he hoped it wouldn't end too soon.
"True., true, I am. I can probably introduce you to my cousin too. She's a senshi, but, she's a healer." Susanoo explained. "Her sphere's pretty... Well it's on the more nebulous side. I think." Susanoo motioned.
"Oh, you want a surprise." Susanoo laughed. "Those will happen, I just know the menu too well." Susanoo admitt4ed. This was nice. He generally wasn't fond of solo patrols, so this was refreshing. And another friend was never amiss.
Eos Galvus
((The End))
